You just have to.

I believe in the sun even when it's not shining.
I believe in love even when I don't feel it.
I believe in God even when he is silent.

I just have to.
because there is nothing else to hold onto.
It's funny how death makes you think so much about life, isn't it?

How do you tell someone they are going to die?

How do you explain? How do you make things right? How do you tell them that everything happens for a reason, when you don't truly believe it? It's not fair! It's not fair for a guy who yesterday was worrying about his finals to be today worrying about his life. Who gets to say that that is OK? How can God say that that is OK? How do you stay strong when you look into his face and all you see now is a dying man? How do you act like nothing is wrong? Like tomorrow is just another day? It's not! Tomorrow isn't just another day. Tomorrow could be the LAST day! The only day. How do you make that OK?

This SUCKS...and that is all that I can say.

Let it be.

That's my new motto for life. Just let it be. For the time being I am through worring about all the little details in life. No longer am I going to go through each and every day over analyzing every moment of my day. I want to live carefree. I want to enjoy life for what it is. I want to lay in the grass and sing really loud and dance like I'm not at Harding...and I want to do all of these things just because I can. I don't want to worry about my classes or my career or my summer or my relationships. I want to be satified with where I am in life and not freak out about the future. I want to let things happen how they will. I trust God to take care of me, don't I? So then why am I worring about all of these things. I'm not saying that I am going to become some kind of new age hippie, oblivious to the things around me, ignorant when there is something to worry about...but I am through worrying about details that are in the hands of my Lord. I am at peace with life. So for now...come to me with drama and I will simply say...Let it be.

How Dare You

How dare you do this to me...saying the things that you do, making me believe in crap that isn't true. How dare you walk into my life...acting like we've got some bond, like i'm some friend you've come to lean on. How dare you sit there...with a smirk on your face, telling me my place. How dare you comfort me...with your words all full of lies, telling me what I despise. How dare you come here...when I know those things aren't true, but still making me believe you. How dare you walk with me...because I know it's truth I need, not your foolish, selfish deeds. How dare you stay here still...when I want you to get out, and I'm not afraid to shout...HOW DARE YOU!

ps...in response to the last post...I think that love is our earthly connection to God. It is the way in which we can mentally begin to understand who God is. God and Love are synonymous in their purest form. Unfortunately, we on Earth have tainted both, making each of these less than they truly are.

Love...

It seems to be the topic on everyone's mind, and apparently it is what I write about...so what the heck. Sunday morning I spent some time in the Cathcart lobby. It was quiet...peaceful. Everyone else was either off to church or still sleeping away in their beds, but me, I was in the lobby with my Bible, a pen, and some paper...and this is what became of it.

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Having faith is committing to persevere nomatter what your day-to-day situation. We must continue to endure during both the good times and the bad. We must not get caught up in an unhealthy perfectionism, however, because it is then that we will tear ourselves to shreds and nothing will be left but broken, hopeless pieces.
Our ultimate purpose while on this Earth is to learn how to love. The greatest commandment is to love the Lord, and the second is to love others. God is love. When we truly discover love, we will truly know God. In this great search toward finding love, we will find Godly love, earthly love, and ways to share love. Our lives will be about sharing both our love and God's love with those around us. When we find a way to do that, we will have found God's plan for our lives.
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It seems that love is almost equal to perfectionism. None of us have it figured out yet, and I think it is wrong to judge those around us because of their imperfections. We are all screwups, and I think that the sooner we all realize that, the sooner we will be able to except each other and (dare I say it) love each other like we should.